“After your Bar Mitzvah you don’t have to go to Religious School anymore.”

I don’t remember this happening when I was that age. Maybe it did. Although I was a part of a 10th grade Confirmation class of more than 20 so I am guessing not. This is a huge thing where we belong.

Yael was one of two Bnai Mitzvahs to attend after their big day. It has been about the same for some time at our synagogue. I thought it was a synagogue thing. Then I thought it was a Conservative Judaism thing. Then I asked Google.

It seems it is not local or just a concern for Conservative Jews. It is in all branches of Judaism and it has been for quite a while. The first article I found quoted earlier warnings from the 1930’s and 40’s.

Some articles:
Staying Connected After the B’nei Mitzvah: a Teen’s Perspective | Reform Judaism

How Can We Make B’nai Mitzvah Matter More to Teens? | Reform Judaism

The suggestions:

Start early – Congregations with Early Childhood programs have fewer drop outs.

Jewish Friends – Children want to be where their friends are. Given that my children have no friends that cross over form secular school to religious school, this will be tough.

A congregational mantra of you will attend – difficult when many of the parents do not attend functions past pre-school.

Family Education Programs – I am assuming this mean programs that bridge the gap between 3 year olds and 70 year olds.

Students are active participants in the congregation – CRC a congregation with about 50 Bnai Mitzvot a year requires post Bnai Mitzvot service participation. Almost all of their students stay to the 10th grade.